To get to the root of what ails us and to heal from it, don’t forget to read about Trauma and Grief after you’re done here.
Neurodivergence
Neurodivergence is a way of talking about all the people who fall outside of the neurotypical social norms. It’s a way of saying, “these systems weren’t designed for us but we’re here anyway, we matter, and we’re going to live meaningful lives.”
Neurotypical in this sense broadly means someone who is “normal” in our society and neurotypical culture represents the pressure to be “normal.” To hide those parts of us that are different, special, or just more complicated than some people want to deal with.
Neurotypical culture shows up in the systems of oppression known as sanism – harms targeting “mentally ill” people, and suicidism – harms targeting suicidal people.
Neurodivergent people experience a broad range of struggles: personal, social, school, work, and more.
Yet, neurodivergent people also experience deep connection with each other through art, community building, and mutual support.
I believe that your neurodivergence is a nuanced part of you that you can work with in neurodivergent affirming therapy.
Specific Diagnoses
I have to be honest with you. I don’t think of people primarily in terms of their diagnosis, and if you’re looking for a therapist who is laser focused on your diagnosis, you’re better off looking elsewhere.
Why?
Well, the short version is that diagnoses are collections of symptoms. They are inherently subjective and also don’t explain where those symptoms are coming from.
I like to think of people primarily in terms of their life circumstances and the wider systems that have impacted their lives. This helps us to see where things are coming from AND means that we can change.
We’re not stuck with our diagnoses or symptoms forever.
That said, I’m not against diagnoses. They can be a helpful way to understand a cluster of symptoms and to find supports. In my experience, I have seen that people with similar clusters of diagnoses tend to have similar sorts of struggles in their lives.
With that in mind I’ve devised a rough outline of a plan for our work together if you do identify with a specific diagnosis. In alphabetical order:
ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder)
I don’t believe you have a deficit of attention, but instead you might struggle with directing your attention to the things that matter to you. To work through this we’ll focus on pausing, being present, and mindfully directing attention.
Anxiety
Anxiety gets a bad rap. The people I’ve met who struggle with anxiety have good reasons for that, it’s not coming from nowhere.
Usually if we’re anxious about something, that indicates two things: we can do more to prepare for a given thing, and there also is some lingering unresolved feelings about a previous situation.
We’ll be listening to your anxiety to learn more about how you can prepare in the present and process the past.
ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder)
If you’ve received this diagnosis, you probably have some justified anger about something, and you’ve gotten in trouble for your response to the thing that caused your anger.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with you. This system sets people up to fail.
In our work together, we’ll work with emotions especially anger, reframing your life experiences, and connecting with community.
Autism
If you connect with a diagnosis of autism, you likely will struggle with sensory overload, shutdown, and difficulties in relationships.
In our work together we’ll focus on making your world more accessible, identifying triggers and making strategies for dealing with them, and navigating relationships.
Bipolar
Think of yourself like a metronome gone haywire. You swing back and forth from extreme to extreme. You want to find a way to settle in the middle, but you’re having difficulty settling. You keep moving because moving is your normal.
Often this type of situation arises from black and white thinking. We’re either at the top of the world or the absolute bottom.
You will likely have moments of insight where you can see the nuance, yet it’s difficult for that insight to emotionally resonate with you. So that’s what we will be working on – bridging the gap between logic and emotion. And to continue on with that metronome example, imagine a metronome that slowly reduces its range of swinging from wild abandon, to a measured range.
Borderline
If you’ve been diagnosed as borderline, I know that you’ve been betrayed by people or institutions that you were supposed to be able to trust. You have justified anger about that.
In our work together we’ll focus on meeting your historically unmet needs, building trust, navigating difficult emotions, and more.
Depression
Depression, to me, represents a stuckness and a crisis of meaning.
Our work together to resolve this stuckness involves connecting with narrative, values, and identity.
DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder)
DID represents a variety of experiences, from an innocuous second voice to a full blown community of alters with their own personalities and motivations.
Success in healing through DID exists along a spectrum from integration to community democracy to somewhere in between.
Where is the best place for you in this spectrum? That’s up to you. In our process, we’ll hold space for any and all of your voices/parts/alters who would like to participate.
Eating Disorders
Eating disorders arise out of a need for safety and control. Often these start in childhood, where what goes in or out of our bodies is one of the few things we have any control over.
In working with eating disorders, you can expect us to generally work on building a sense of agency and control in your life. We’ll also be processing the past and where this need for control comes from.
Any changes will be up to your discretion with my nonjudgemental support. I use a HAES (health at every size) framework.
Narcissism
We have all both been harmed, and harmed others. This is what it means to be human, there is no escaping this.
The diagnosis of “narcissism” is not usually one that people choose – it’s usually bestowed by someone else who feels that the narcissist has harmed them.
This can be dehumanizing for the person labeled the narcissist.
Have you the narcissist harmed someone? Yes, because this is what it means to be human. But you’ve been harmed too.
When we work together we’ll be developing an understanding of how the past is connected to the present, and how being harmed is connected to causing harm. We’ll also discuss accountability in instances where you were harmed and where you caused harm.
OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
OCD arises out of both a need for control and magical thinking. Magical thinking is intimately connected with intuition and creativity. It’s an amazing thing and not the reason people with OCD struggle.
The reason people with OCD struggle is they’re trying to avert a horrible situation that echoes something else that has already happened. There is some prior pain and now you’re hoping to avert it from happening again.
In our work together, we’ll be working through some grief about that original thing, developing alternative coping strategies, and building agency in your response to triggers.
Schizophrenia
I look at schizophrenia as a severe form of trauma coming out of a person’s experiences of harm followed by not being believed. It’s a category that our society reserves for pariahs.
Yes, we might have somewhat different versions of reality. I don’t believe it is my place to tell you what is or isn’t “real” unless you’re asking me for my opinion.
My role in supporting you is listening to you, believing that there is truth in your experiences, and giving you the space to sort out what happened to you and how you would like to move forward.
SUD (Substance Use Disorder)
I view substance use as a sensible response to overwhelming circumstances. It’s a way to regulate that is consistent, when you don’t have other reliable options.
In working with substance use, we often need to target other areas first or at the same time. That means building a toolkit for different strategies to handle overwhelming situations, and facing uncomfortable truths about life.
When it comes to your relationship with your substance(s), my intention is to be mindful of medical concerns and its impact on your relationships and personal plans.
Any changes in your relationship with your substance(s) will be up to your discretion with my nonjudgemental support. I believe in an explicitly harm reductionist approach.